I passed last semester’s classes!!! I am in my last semester of classes and I couldn’t be more excited! I am finally closing this chapter of my life and moving on to better things. I will soon be moving in with my boyfriend and starting to teach. I can’t wait!! I am frantically looking for a place to live (Demetri is no help) but it seems like it will all work out. Classes are starting again on Monday, but this is the end. I will finally be able to live like I have always hoped.
I have been going to therapy for a few months now and I am really feeling better. I still have my ups and downs, but I am getting there when it comes to coping with the problems I have had when it comes to the church. The problem I have been running into is I am still spinning out of my mind when it comes to relationship security. I worry incessantly and I need to not.
One thing I am trying to realize is that it is okay for your S/O to miss people, without wanting to be with them. I need to remember that my relationship is not diminished by the past. My brain just starts working on over time trying to make me be the only person in my boyfriend’s life. And it doesn’t need to be that way. In fact it shouldn’t
My parents have always told me that in a relationship (next to God) they should be the priority. Which is true, but that does not mean that nobody else exists. That’s what I am struggling with now. Other people are going to be important, and not everyone who is important is going to be the same kind off important. Does that make any sense? It does to me. But its hard to change your thinking. I guess what I need to remember is this
- I love Demetri
- He loves me
- We are moving in together and starting a life
- I should be excited
- he has never given me a reason not to trust him
- My fears should not guide my actions
- My past does not define me and neither does his
- He has chosen me, and I him
- Embrace change
- RELAX
I lived a Lie for Too Long 